Category: Frustrated

Numb & Number

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On Tuesday I worked from home for 6 1/2 hours. A long day for me whether at home or the office. It doesn’t seem as long at home because I don’t have the 60 mile round trip drive!

Late morning I started to realize I was very cold, then realized it was only my right hand. It was freezing. I went into Dave’s office, placed my right hand on his bare right arm and he said it was freezing to the touch. My left hand however, was fine. I’ve always had circulation problems with my hands and feet, but never just one at a time. Very odd.

Then I thought it was where my arm was hitting the edge of my desk for my mouse. My desk or mouse location have not changed…I have. I took a break from my computer to whip up some lunch and while slicing some veggies and ham for a sandwich, my index finger and thumb on my right hand went numb and stayed that way for awhile.

It doesn’t hurt, doesn’t prevent me from doing anything with them, it’s just very discerning and a bit annoying not knowing exactly what is causing it since I had the ruptured annie. The feeling in my fingers came back just as quickly as it came on and it’s always in my right hand. I REALLY need to find out what’s taking so long with the referral from my PCP for the neurologist. I’d really to have an appointment set up to
discuss things like this with her.

Still Here

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I’m still here, but getting wicked tired, especially on the days I’m working. Mostly my eyes and head bother me at the end of the day. Now I think I’m fighting a head cold or sinus infection of some kind. Have felt really horrible the last two days.

BUT, I did finally get my hair cut. I’ve been putting it off until I felt I could handle having my head jerked around and setting backwards over the sink. I was tired when I got home, but so glad I did it. I look and feel so much better having a good hair cut. LOL It’s been a LONG time!

The Frustration with the Frustration

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It has now come to my being frustrated…because I’m frustrated! Yikes!

I get frustrated when I can’t just up and do something that I used to be able to do….like get in the car and go to the grocery store. I don’t like HAVING to rely on people do so much for me, especially when I CAN do other things, but not some still. Stores are still the biggy for me. So it’s double frustrating.

I feel guilty asking for something. I feel like I’m a burden sometimes. I know I AM, but I don’t like feeling that way. But I can’t help it sometimes…I have to be. I don’t like it anymore than they do. I just can’t do the big stores yet. I know I can’t when the smaller stores still bother me.

I could only un-decorate HALF the Christmas tree and Dave ended up  having to take down literally everything else. I felt so horrible, just sitting up was a struggle. I hate to have him do that and wish I could have done more. I may have been able to, but much later in the day and even then, not sure how much.

It’s frustrating being frustrated!

Pseudo Migraine

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I had a really good day on Friday. I never had to take a pain pill (only a Sudafed very late in the day) and I seemed to have some energy.

I did about five ads for work at my computer, ate really well, walked 20 minutes and even drove Dave and I into town to pick up a pizza for lunch. So, it was with great surprise that
Saturday turned out to be so crappy.

I awoke with some pain, but that’s nothing unusual. I ate breakfast and felt better. Took a shower while Dave went
to the dump. When he returned, he got all the Christmas storage boxes down and we began putting Christmas away finally.

My job was the tree. I got about half of it undecorated, then proceeded to completely poop out and get a little dizzy due to all the turning around and bending over. I guess I was thinking un-decorating the tree wouldn’t effect me as much as decorating it did seeing how it was almost a month later. Guess not.

Then, my eyes started to give me trouble. CRAP! Another migraine? I didn’t want to take any chances if it was, so I
immediately took two Excedrin Migraine pills and went to bed for a bit. I had some pain for awhile, but nothing major. I got up to eat something and the pain wasn’t bad, but I sure had no energy and didn’t feel good in general. I felt that
way the rest of the day.

Perhaps it was just sinus or everything I had done on Friday was effecting me the day after. I don’t have a clue. I
couldn’t take another pill until around 7 p.m.. Since Benedryl had helped earlier in the week with my sinus, I took another one of those, but it really didn’t help. I didn’t feel good right up until I went to bed. Pretty much all day…which meant poor Dave was left doing everything again. Why does he put up with me?

It’s frustrating when I get a false alarm on a migraine, but I don’t want to NOT treat it if it feels like one. The Excedrin always makes me feel woozy and jittery any way, but at least it helps with the duration and intensity of the migraine pain…IF it’s a migraine.

I don’t like not knowing what’s causing my pain. Before the aneurysm, I knew a migraine from a regular head ache. I
knew a Sinus headache…I know a stress headache. And, in turn, I knew what to take for it, but when I take something to help pain that I don’t know what thenroot cause of it is, then it turns out NOT to help, I can’t take anything else
for awhile, so then I suffer.

I guess I really need to find that neurologist now so perhaps they can help me know what’s serious, what’s sinus,
what’s aneursym, what’s migraine and what might require a new scan. It’s true I feel having another check up and scan six months after something this serious is a long time to wait. But I guess that’s the norm and it’s normal to be concerned when you have head pain after an aneursym. Even though the neuroradiologist told me a signal for a problem with the existing aneurysm would be something more catastrophic, I can’t help but think that another aneurysm has developed and these are symptoms of it. How can I not when I had an aneurysm before, but never knew it. I know I”m just being paranoid, but some days, it’s hard not too be.

I guess this blog has become the “complain and whine” blog. I know other people are going through much worse than me right now and probably never complain. God bless them. I guess my threshold for pain is just too low and I need to vent.